Growing up, I struggled with a low self-esteem. It would take a lot for me to feel “worthy”.
Many times I would long to hear compliments and reassuring words from my friends and those around me. And many times, I actively sought for them.
This is the first time I am saying this out loud; so to speak. It has taken me a while to admit and give a name to something that was born early in my pre-teen years. It has taken me even longer to learn that I needn’t worry about what people think. Comparison is the thief of joy.
“What brought this on?”, you may ask. Well, you know that stage of growing where you can’t quite tell whether you are a child or a teenager? The stage where your skin might or might not breakout with acne? The stage when your chest is beginning to “bloom”? The stage where your hair is deciding what it should or shouldn’t look like? This for me was when it all begun.
I couldn’t fathom what was happening to my body and I did not like it. In set the comparison, the need to please and impress and out flew whatever self-love I might have had. It was hard getting out of this dark phase. And having a few “mean girls” around me did not help.
Lucky for me, this story ends with me on top!
YOU ARE ENOUGH. YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL. EVERY FLAW, EVERY IMPERFECTION, EVERY CURVE IS PERFECT. YOU ARE ENOUGH.
The rainbow wouldn’t be as beautiful without its perfect blend of colors. We all can’t be the same. Our individuality and differences are uniquely beautiful. Your chocolate-brown skin is gold! Whatever scar it bears, only tells an elegant story of your journey. Your Kinky Curly hair is full with charm. Wear it boldly and with pride!
Sometimes, I regret the years I spent pining away from the lack of self-love but I think of all the lessons I would not have learnt had I not walked through that valley. And I am grateful for the terrain on this journey, life.
We should love ourselves so fiercely, that when others see us they know exactly how it should be done. Work on loving the person in the mirror who has been through so much but is still standing.